Bill Belichick on Tom Brady returning to Patriots: 'He never left'

We here at CBS Sports are very pleased to bring to you on this holiday Friday "Great Moments in Bill Belichick Press Conference History," Vol. 345.

Just another in the long line of deadpan, kind-of-jerkish-but-mostly-hysterical moments involving the Patriots coach and the media, this began when someone decided to ask Bill if he was pumped about Tom Brady returning to the team after he won the Deflategate case.

The most important thing here? Belichick is 100 percent accurate. Brady never left. He's been practicing and playing in the preseason and only theoretically suspended for the first four games of 2015.

Never to be deterred, there were follow-ups.

Q: What are your thoughts on him being available to play the first four games of the season?

BB: We'll do the best that we can to have the best plan, the best preparation for Pittsburgh, same as we always do.

Oh hey and Bill while we're here. How do you feel about Deflategate in general?

Q: As far as you're concerned, is everything from the AFC Championship Game and deflated footballs and all that, is that all in the rearview mirror?

BB: We're focused on Pittsburgh.

Right on. Ever worried about Brady getting suspended?

Q: Was the coaching staff prepared to have Tom Brady for Week 1 all along?

BB: Right now, we're going to take the players that are available and try to figure out the best way to prepare our team for the Steelers Thursdaynight. That's all we're doing.

The best part about all this is it was on a conference call. So there's not even any awkward stare-down moments, but there is that hilarious stretch of weird silence that might be more entertaining.

Here's hoping someone at NFL Films was hanging out filming and we'll see it in the next Belichick "A Football Life" episode.

Bill Belichick is out there deadpanning again. (Getty Images)